Parenting Todays Teens and a GIVEAWAY!

***WINNER - Qualifying Post number 10 - Candi!!*** thanks to all that participated, tweeted and otherwise helped to spread the word! And if you didn't win, never fear - I will be giving away more of Mark's books this summer over on Tales!!!

I am taking a break from Wordless Wednesday this week to ask a favor of everyone who takes the time to stop by my little blog and maybe some of their friends too.

A dear friend of mine runs a fantastic program for troubled teens. Their program is located in East Texas, takes children from all over the country and really helps give these kids a new start, a new look on life and some wonderful stepping stones for their future. They recently celebrated their 20th Anniversary of helping children, families and communities through the power of love and the lord.

The name of the program is Heartlight Ministries and the person I am speaking about is Mark Gregston. This week I received an email from Mark asking for help with something I am not yet qualified to help with, though I know some of you and those who aren't might know someone who is!

IN HIS WORDS:

Another favor to ask...
Someone once said, "Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless." Many parents are heroes in their own right. They do what needs to be done, even if their children may not like them for it. But in the end, they are heroes to their children as well.

The favor I'd like to ask is for you to share one or more of your heroic feats with me. We are taking a survey of the tactics that parents use that have proven successful in bringing about a change in thinking or behavior in their teenager. For instance, "My son was being mouthy and rude, so I did this and his attitude quickly changed."

I've set up an anonymous online form so we can all learn from your tactics. It is at the following link:

http://www.heartlightministries.org/survey

I'd really appreciate it if you would click through to the survey form and tell me how you successfully handled one or more difficult teenager issues in your home, so I can share your ideas and tactics with other parents, either in my blogs or on the radio or in an upcoming book.
Mark Gregston

IN MY WORDS:
Please take a minute to consider this survey and possibly forward it on. If you have any questions about Mark, Heartlight Ministries or this favor please feel free to comment and/or email me!

Because I REALLY want to spread the word as much as humanly possible I am going to offer another JUICY JUICE Goody bag to one lucky person who takes the time to answer the survey, Tweets the survey and/or passes it on to a friend or neighbor. You can get another entry if you post a link back to this post on your blog this week!

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL (do I sound like that Billy guy on the infomercials?)- that winner will also receive a copy of "Parenting Teens in a Confusing Culture" by Mark Gregston!

We are going with the honor system because I love you all and know you will be honest...There are SEVERAL ways to enter the contest (do as many as you like!)

Leave a comment if you take the survey

Leave a comment if you forward the post to a friend to take the survey

Leave a comment if you post a link back to this post this week

Leave a comment if you TWEET this post

Leave a comment including your tips, tricks or aggravations with teens

Leave a comment about your Teen Years Fears if you don't have a teen yet!

Contest will end Sunday at 10pm MST

So hop to it, lets really prove the power of the mom blogger and help me help my friend Mark!

THANKS TO ALL!

They so want to be BIG

When we set out to start a family I had visions of the 1 boy, 1 girl, 2 parents and that was the way it was gonna be. But life had other plans for me and I got sisters! Sisters. I am not equipped to deal with sisters.

All this because Hailey aspires to be big, not big in a large super-sized kind of way, but big in the "all growed up" kind of way. When your 3 year old wants to do everything your 8 old does it cannot possibly get any better when they are 8 and 12 or 11 and 16. Can you even imagine?

Her latest has been a year long dream to get out of her "baby" car seat and into a booster, the first step to sitting on the real car and not in a seat like Lauren does. I recently looked up the car seat laws again, and again, because I find them a bit daunting...and found that Hailey was going to be 12 5 before she could use a plain old booster with no back (which we have 2 of). Why so old? Because you have to be 40 pounds and 4 years to sit on the plain old booster, and Hailey weighs 29 pounds soaking wet - gaining 11 pounds before her 4th birthday is just about impossible.

SO, even though we have 2 plain old boosters I set out to get her the kind with the back that comes off (if she ever reaches 40lbs) and boy oh boy...did I make her day!

She was SO happy, and thrilled - to her this is OK, she is a "Bigger" girl now and she can even buckle herself! (which also means she can unbuckle...hmmm.)

She even took the time to notice all the differences, like "Mom where do I hang onto?" I asked what she meant and she went on to explain that when mommy slams on the breaks she needs a place to hang on to. Guess she realized that this car seat was not as "sturdy" as her old one but maybe mom shouldn't slam on the breaks eh?

She had to call everyone she knew, and tell them all about her new "big girl" seat. It was fun to see how excited she was!!

Oh and hey, that may be a real phone but it doesn't work - Just don't tell her that or I might have to hunt you down!

So big and so much more...

Poor Hailey, she wants to be big so bad. She is convinced she grows when she drinks milk (which she hates so we are talking about an ounce a day) - and each time she eats something she asks if it will make her bigger. Tonight it was Watermelon "Mom, Watermelon make me bigger?" Yes Hailey...followed by a big Hailey Thumbs Up!I find myself always struggling to not wish her life away as she does grow bigger. It has always been hard for me to remind myself that kids need to be kids, not only that, but they are allowed to be kids. My problem is always the "age appropriate" behavior. With both Lauren and Hailey we have been blessed with very bright little girls, mature daily behavior and so much more...however when they pop off and act their age it is a constant struggle to remember that it is OK! It may not be RIGHT but it is OK. I mean Hailey is not even three yet, by most standards she is still just a baby. Many her age can not speak in complete sentences let alone formulate the thought processes and care that Hailey demonstrates. However, when she screams bloody murder because I wont let her where her fancy spinny dress...that is NORMAL... Take a deep breath mom, stand back, hold your ground and say "not today Hailey" then explain "why" later when she is not upset...RIGHT...Well, I keep forgetting. I try to explain when she is sad and/or mad and unable to really listen. SHAME.

I know I shouldn't wish away the days, months and years. I know children grow up too fast. I know that each time I blink something else has changed. As Trace Adkins puts it "You're Gonna Miss This". I know I am going to miss it, I already miss so much, But I can't help but to find myself wishing it all away in spite of myself. On one hand I can't wait to use the restroom all by myself each and everytime I need to go, take a shower that doesn't end with "hang on let me at least get my towel first", eat dinner without wiping a spill or cringing as the catsup drips down the brand new white shirt, drop Hailey off at school and have her not be screaming - on the other hand I want to hold on tight and never let go, I want to listen to every song they sing with a full heart, I want to engrave every precious thing they say into my brain and never lose it, I want to cherish each and every day and moment and try to maintain my patience, I want to remember their age and every wonderful thing they each have to offer this family and this world. So for now all I can do is say "I'll try, I'll keep trying" And maybe Lauren will give ME a big thumbs up for doing so...

Sadly we lost my Uncle Glenn today. My family was not real close to theirs but it very sad none the less. I just saw him about 18 months ago, a healthy father of 3 and husband. Just a couple months ago he was diagnosed with Lymphoma and despite Dr's largest efforts his body was unable to resist and the cancer took over. My dad was just out to visit him on Saturday and he passed away earlier today. I feel so much sadness for the family, the kids and his wife, I feel a sense of relief for Glenn as the suffering has ended and he is in a better place, I feel a great loss for my grandfather (Glenn's dad) as he has lost a son and so much more for my own father who has lost his brother early in life. I wish all the best to the family and hope everyone can find peace in his departure and celebrate his life.

Far away here in Colorado I found myself having to explain things to Hailey in the best "2 year" fashion I could. I was in this position after I told Lauren what had happened and Hailey heard and inquired "Why you sad mommy, why Grandpa is sad?" - feeling on the spot but also feeling the need to say something right rather than hide it I said..."Hailey Grandpa's brother has died and has gone to heaven and his family won't see him anymore" so our little angel replies "Grandpa is sad acause he lost him brother and he won't be able to play with him anymore" to which my eyes filled with tears and pride at the same time. Such a little angel as I sit silent she says "Sorry mommy, Sorry Grandpa - it will be ok"

To Uncle Glenn, Grandma Slingerlend and family:

Today we mourn the loss of another family member,

today we remember all the good he did in life,

today we rejoice in the life he gave to Sara, Jon and Jim

today we cherish the love he had for Jan and others around him

Today we thank the lord for reuniting Glenn with his mother

and we thank you lord, that we are here today to remember and to say thank you.

I am also reminded of the first verse of a Michael W Smith song:

Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
Cant believe the hopes hes granted
Means a chapter in your life is through
But well keep you close as always
It wont even seem youve gone
cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

Give extra hugs to everyone you love tonight...

Favorite Photos over the Years

I will be adding more shows from 2000 - 2006 over the coming days. I am learning how to make them and post them. To click through the slides use the arrows on the lower left.